Mama Bunkfish

Navigating marriage, motherhood, and mental illness on Jesus, caffeine, and naps!

The Fallacy of Happiness

In 2014 Pharrell released the mega-hit, ‘Happy’. Once my children heard it, their requests to listen to ‘The Happy Song’ were daily. I sang and danced along with them, laughing at how they messed up the words. Happiness is something that is often the topic of everything from ad campaigns (Hershey’s ‘Happiness Is…’) to famous sayings, to why people leave a job, marriage, or other situation. But as I’ve gotten older and life has gotten more intense, I’ve realized that being ‘happy’ isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

If you go back and read my post “He’s There” you’ll get a brief rundown on some of the things I’ve been mulling over. One of the things I’ve mentioned is that I’ve always had joy. The thing is, and this is so cliche but I’ll say it anyway, happiness is fleeting. It’s situational. Think about it like this; if you have a kid that’s sick and vomiting all over you, you aren’t happy.  But you have joy because although your child is sick, he or she is alive and you aren’t mourning their loss like so many parents. Some might say this is a simplistic example but it goes to show that our moments in time can cause our feelings of happiness to disappear on a whim. I wake up every morning with joy, but depending on the weather outside, I’m not a happy person (like when it’s 98 degrees with a heat index of 105).

I’ll take it a step further. ‘Happy’ is brought to you by situations. Joy is brought to you by God – and He never changes. When you realize that in spite of your circumstances God is indeed there, you understand that like every other feeling, happy will come and go. One thing I always tell newlyweds is that you won’t always be happy. But if you have joy in God and joy in the fact that you have a spouse, you can work through the unhappy times. It won’t be easy; it never is. So today, and every day, choose joy; because,  it is everlasting.

Until next time…


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