In case you hadn’t noticed I haven’t blogged in awhile. My original goal in blogging was to clear my head; get things off my chest; and maybe even help someone. But I’ve been hesitant to write because I didn’t know what to say or exactly how I was feeling.
My aunt Ruby has cancer. There are a lot of unanswered questions and a lot of waiting and I’m having a hard time with that. For the most part, I’ve come to accept that ultimately I have no control over ANYTHING. While I can do my part, ultimately God’s going to have His way. However, in this particular situation waiting on Him to do His part and knowing who my aunt is, and all she’s overcome, has made me sad. I still believe in Him and I’m not angry. But I am very, very sad.
And for several weeks I didn’t think I could say that – not here. But I have to. Because not saying it might have some people believe that Christians aren’t supposed to be sad. And that’s simply not true. We are going to be sad. There are going to be tears, shouts, and moans. There’s going to be anger, resentment, frustration, and everything else associated with the storms that may come. However through all of that, there will also be joy. Joy in knowing that no matter what, God’s will and plans will be perfect, even though it may not be what we want.
So today, I’ll be sad; and maybe even tomorrow. But when things settle, there WILL be peace and joy.
Until next time…