Mama Bunkfish

Navigating marriage, motherhood, and mental illness on Jesus, caffeine, and naps!

Behind Closed Doors

There’s this Johnson and Johnson commercial that has as its tag line, ‘Having a baby changes everything’. I can remember seeing that commercial while I was pregnant with my daughter (the last time I actually got to really watch TV) and thinking that it was nonsense. And then she was born. And then my son was born.

And everything changed. Of course there were the obvious changes…my clothes, my time commitments, the depth of the bags under my eyes. But the one thing that changed that wasn’t necessarily visible to the outside world was my heart. The babies caused my heart to see the world through a totally different lens. As they’ve gotten older it’s changed even more. It’s caused me to have a newfound respect for children.

As the current school year has progressed, dealing with other people’s children has changed it even more. At least once a day I interact with some little person that hasn’t made a good choice. Usually it’s because they’re tired, hungry, or just being three. But sometimes it’s because at their very young age they’ve been dealt a handful of hurt. Hurt that I can’t even begin to comprehend. 

You see, ten years ago I would’ve laughed at the idea that an eight year old could be stressed. I mean really, what’s stressful about going to school and hanging out with friends? But as I spent more time around young people I came to find that, as a former student told me, life is different behind closed doors. There are things happening in the lives of children these days that isn’t respectful of their bodies, their minds, or their souls. That constant disrespect manifests itself in ways that as adults, we see as defiant, disobedient, and disrespectful. 

The irony though is that as adults, we behave the same way when we feel disrespected; but, we try and justify it. So today, I challenge you. The next time you decide to write off a kid as being a rude, spoiled brat, or disrespectful knucklehead, talk to them. You might find out what’s going on behind closed doors. 

Until next time…


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